comment_fic | free-for-all Friday

free-for-all Friday

It's 1pm where I am, so I hope I'm not stepping out of line by making this post.

Today is Free-For-All Friday, so post any prompts you want. However, please remember the following:

* No more than three promtps from one fandom
* No more than five prompts at a time
* No spoilers until a week after airdate/publication
* If your prompt is answered you can leave another
* If you include spoilers in a fic please warn in bold and leave at least three rows of spoiler-space.

Use the following format:

Angel the Series/Leverage, Lindsey&Eliot, I know your scars like they were my own

NCIS, Gibbs/Tony, Tony vanishes after being fired for refusing the La Grenouille case; Gibbs comes back to help track him down

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Supernatural, Azazel!Dean, Azazel has been riding Dean since the night of the fire. What better way to keep an eye on Sam.

Shadow of Destiny, Homunculus (& or / Eike), He doesn't usually think about how solitary his existence is.

MST3K/Author's Choice, Satellite of Love crew, The MST3K crew watches comments on your favorite (or most hated) scene from any show/film.

Gargoyles/Hellboy, Any, Beautiful freaks

I really like this! I need to see more Nick fic, I really do.

Lost/Supernatural, Jacob & Lucifer, When the Devil rises, he ends up on the Island. (Be as cracky as you want - I just need to see a Jacob & Lucifer interaction)

This was too awesome to not be tagged. XD

Oh, this is wonderful! Poor Sammy 8(

It would be interesting if these two guns did exist.

Writing this right now!

Spoilers for Torchwood Series 1 and 2

One thing about being dead, or disappeared, or whatever it was – there was plenty of time to think. Nothing else to do, in that dreary, empty room that managed to somehow convey both the Inquisition and Abu Ghraib.

For the first while, all Toshiko did was worry about her mother – why couldn’t they just tell her if she was alive or not? What harm could it do? It’s not like she was ever getting out of there.

She obsessed over every detail of the past year, trying to pinpoint where it had all gone so wrong, how she could have magically fixed everything – caught the bad guys, saved the day, saved her mother.

After some time passed, she tried inventing things in her mind. She was convinced there were all sorts of other applications for the sonic weapon they'd made her build – peaceful, practical things you could do with it. She made a list of all of them. She made a list of every half-finished project she’d been working on at the Ministry, and what it would take to complete them.

That took a couple of months.

As time went on she spent more and more of her time just daydreaming, the way she’d done in school. Even in the gifted program, she already knew most of what they were trying to teach her, and didn’t care at about most of the rest of it. So she looked out the window and imagined herself, Toshiko Sato, the youngest ship’s engineer in the Federation, coming up on the fly with a way to boost the engines by another 32%, thus giving the captain just the power he needed to beat the evil aliens and save the day.

Or Princess Toshiko, imprisoned in the tower by an evil ogre, with nothing to do but brush her hair and wear beautiful dresses until the handsome prince swept in to rescue her. Of course, even in her daydreams, she somehow usually managed to figure out how to disable the drawbridge mechanism and save herself before he got there. She liked the idea of the prince regardless.

Daydreams were a much better way to pass the time in prison.

She never quite forgave Jack for not being the prince she’d dreamt of, even though he did rescue her from the tower or dungeon or whatever it was.

He made a pretty good captain, though, and the third or fourth time she came up with some devastatingly clever thing that helped the team save the day from the evil aliens, she realised that he had actually made her dreams come true. The best of them, anyway, the ones where she catches bad guys and saves the day. Saves people.

The thing about both engineers and princesses is that they don’t tend to get into the action all that much. They might be in peril a lot, but rarely in actual danger. That’s the hero’s job – the captain, the prince.

The thing about real life is that it doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes the captain is trapped in the tower, or the prince doesn’t make it out of the room full of radiation.

Sometimes the engineer has to be the hero.

Sometimes the princess has to save the kingdom, even if she can’t save herself.

IT Crowd/Big Bang Theory; Sheldon/Moss; Misunderstanding

but omg yay for Gormenghast!

Supernatural, Dean/Castiel, a reckless summer romance [reckless romance, gotta go, summer day].

Dollhouse/BtVS, Faith and Echo, "I'm not going to throw you out a window or steal your man."

Any; Any/Any; One euphemism too far

Doctor Who, 11 and Rose, "It's 100% different"

Charmed, Paige Matthews, Not so great expectations

Torchwood, author's choice, bad blood

Dollhouse, author's choice, the accused

Supernatural, Sam/Gabriel, I didn't mean to turn you on (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/Ptitlez52cxo3o)

This is not as cracky as we were all hoping. Still preachy! Very preachy. Um, IDEK what this is anymore.
----
Castiel’s popping in and out of places without regard to physics and common sense had been bound to get him into trouble some day. Humans were a curious species by nature. Americans were a nosy culture by practice. So it was that one day Castiel popped into a diner in Minnesota to meet Sam and Dean at the very same time as a lanky black man was being filmed asking the diner’s patrons if they had their birth certificates on them. Castiel was about to become an instant YouTube sensation.

The man who had moments before been politely thanking Minnesotans for telling him where to go back to introduced himself as Wyatt. Castiel liked him, could sense purpose in him, and so when Wyatt asked “How did you do that?” Castiel said, “I am an Angel of the Lord.”

It was hard to argue with the film.

Sam and Dean tried to run interference, tried to downplay their crazy friend as just a run of the mill crazy, but since ending the Apocalypse, Castiel had somehow become an even worse liar. Wyatt and his producer were intrigued, to say the least. They had three guys with some pretty amazing stories about the Apocalypse and one of them had literally appeared out of thin air. It was enough to get them discussing a trip back to New York, but the producer had her doubts.

And then, of course, Castiel whipped out his wings.

“Here? Really?” Dean had said. He didn’t like to share.

The wings were enough. The producer invited Castiel to New York. Sam insisted on going. He had some puns regarding Afghanistan he had been working on that he wanted to share with the writers. Dean had insisted on not going but one look from Castiel did him in. Inevitably, the worst part was choosing whether between flying in a tin can of fear or flying AngelAirways with its strict no restroom policy.

Castiel was surprisingly blasé about the whole thing.

“You realize you’re going on TV, right? Outing yourself as an angel in front of millions of insomniac stoners who will probably think you’re Jesus.”

Castiel’s brow furrowed. “I am not Joshua. I will explain that.”

Sam and Dean exchanged matching how-fucked-are-we? faces. On set, makeup artists powdered Castiel’s forehead and someone from wardrobe asked if he would mind taking off his trench coat.

“I would mind, yes.”

The wardrobe assistant had bowed slightly and disappeared. Dean kept his eye on her as he was naturally suspicious of anyone who expressed an interest in undressing Castiel. In the green room a producer went over some of the possible questions the host, Jon Stewart, might ask. Castiel nodded at some, tilted his head at others, and asked Dean what teabagging was after one particular question. The free beer provided did not feel as good coming out of Dean’s nose as it had felt going down.

“He doesn’t follow politics,” Sam said.

“So no Joe Biden jokes?”

“No Joe Biden jokes,” Sam said. “But I’ve got a few—“

“Sam,” Dean interrupted. Then to the producer said, “Just stick to life, the universe, and everything.”

From the green room, they watched the show unfold. The green room was much better than the Beautiful Room. Sam had baby carrots to snack on and Dean had free beer to get drunk on. The only thing that could have made it better was porn. But the television was tuned to the show. Ahead of Castiel’s interview they ran a segment about the Apocalypse called “Apocalypse? Schmapocalypse!” Sam noted it wasn’t their finest pun. In the segment Stewart ran through the some of the more cataclysmic events tied to Lucifer’s return but pointed out that these were no Acts of God and that no Act of God had intervened. That it was the actions of a few men who prevented the End of All Things. “And, not surprisingly, none of those men were in Washington, DC.”

There was commercial break. Dean was nervous. Sam was nervous. Castiel was still blasé about the whole thing. Dean wasn’t sure if hitting him or kissing him would even elicit an emotional response at this point.

Another producer popped in and shepherded Castiel out. The next thing Sam and Dean knew they were watching Castiel, still in his trench coat, still with his tie pulled loose, on television. Sitting across from Jon Stewart. They had stopped the Apocalypse, but Dean thought this might be a whole different kind of catastrophe.

“Welcome back ladies and gentleman!” Stewart turned to sternly point his pen at a camera. He said, “Heathens, change the channel now. I’m serious. Because tonight we have an Angel of the Lord joining us. He was instrumental in turning that Apocalypse into a Schmapocalypse, please join me in welcoming Castiel!”

Castiel nodded at Stewart, then the audience. The clapping went on for a while. Had Castiel’s name been easier to pronounce, Sam was sure there would have been chanting. All Dean could hear in the audience were the far too frequent I-love-yous and proposals of marriage.

Stewart said, “So. God really exists?”

“He does.”

“And He’s a He?”

“Yes.”

Dean opened another beer. This was going to be seven minutes of Hell. The system had failed. Somehow Sam and Dean had neglected to mention that Castiel was not one for elaboration.

“How screwed am I?” Stewart asked.

“Only the truly evil are saved a place in Hell. You are not evil.”

“Well, thank you,” Stewart said, playing bashful. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

Castiel tilted his head. Stewart was not deterred. He had never interviewed Sarah Palin, but that had to be much, much worse. At least the angel answered in complete sentences and did not seem to have any notes written on his hand.

“So God’s real. He’s a man. And He’s Christian. Good day to be Rick Warren,” Stewart said.

“God is real, but He is but one God. The God of Christianity, Judaism, and Islam. The gods of other faiths exist, as well.”

Stewart’s eyebrows went up at that. “That’s actually quite reassuring,” he said.

Dean scoffed. He already had to deal with the fallout from one tradition’s Apocalypse. He was not looking forward to dealing with the other faiths’ end of days, too.

“Going back a bit, to Hell. You said only the truly evil go to Hell. But the Bible lays out a whole bunch of evil things that could get me sent to hell. Wearing wool and cotton together. Shaving. I mean, I look terrible with a beard.”

“The Bible gets many things wrong. Some major, some minor. Those you mentioned included.”

Stewart nodded. “What about homosexuality? Is gay marriage an affront to God?”

Sam stopped eating his baby carrots. Dean kept drinking. Dean drank even more when he saw Sam staring at him out of the corner of his eye.

“No,” Castiel said. “You humans have constructed many social mores to better control each other and ascribed their purpose to God. And in your efforts to demean and ostracize, you’ve only strayed farther from God’s intent. God created humans to love indiscriminately.”

“Kind of hard to argue with an angel,” Stewart said. “What about you guys? How do you fit in?”

Except Castiel did not make the metaphorical jump from love to the grand scheme of things. He said, “We also love indiscriminately. I am what you would likely consider a gay man.”

Sam beat Dean’s back, trying to help him get the alcohol out of his lungs.

“Though as an angel I have no human form, I do occupy this body while on here on Earth.”

Stewart was, to say the least, surprised. He lapsed into celebrity mode. “Oh, well, are you seeing anyone?”

“I am. His name is Dean,” Castiel said. “And I would like to get gay married to him.”

Dean and his coughing fit were on their own because Sam was too busy laughing to help his brother. Sam didn’t stop laughing for hours. He laughed the entire car ride to wherever Dean was racing their little rental car. Sam stopped laughing when they crossed the Massachusetts state line and Dean stopped at a little Unitarian church in Springfield.

Supernatural, Dean/Castiel, The way to a man's heart is through his stomach (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ThroughHisStomach) (or The One Where Cas Tries To Woo Dean With Food)

This is absolutely, hauntingly gorgeous. I love how same is both desperate and resigned.

Ooooo! Creepy.

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Page 7 of 14

free-for-all Friday

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Re: the star of mourning - gen, PG

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Re: No fic, but:

Re: roughdrafts and masterpieces - PGish, gen, AU

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The Princess in the Tower - pg, gen

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No fic...

Um, Twitter kept talking about comment_fic so here I am.

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(1/2) Schmapocalypse Now, Dean/Castiel, PG-13

(2/2) Schmapocalypse Now, Dean/Castiel, PG-13

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Re: roughdrafts and masterpieces - PGish, gen, AU

Re: the reign of a thousand years - PGish, gennish, more twisting of the Biblical mythos