They were both bad at straight whiskey shots. Ted usually cut his with Coca-Cola and Barney loved mixing his with Red Bull. But after seeing Robin bolt down about six and happily head off to work with neither a wobble to her step or slur to her voice, guy logic said they had to beat her for the honor of bros everywhere.
Three shots in, it started to get ridiculous. For one thing neither of them had even tried the 160 proof Whiskey Robin preferred. They generally stuck to 101 proof themselves.
Generally the world’s worst bets are among men… to be more clear… drunk men. And at two o’ four am, Ted came across his worst idea ever.
“I bet you five hundred that you aren’t as hot as you think you are.”
“You’re on… it’s a foolish Ted to get in a bet with a master debater and a cunning linguist.”
---
The result Barney was in the corner of McLaren's, his mouth pressed to that of a hispanic male's, arms wrapped around the man's neck, allowing the other man to cup his slack-covered taunt buttocks with both hands. As Ted watched, Barney's hand suddenly uncurled with two fingers up. Without even breaking liplock, Barney sent a quick bro-lepthic message, "Ted, Ted, right here."
Ted rolled his eyes and returned the bro-lepthy message. "Okay, fine, fine... you win. Men love you too. The five hundred is yours." He gulped back his beer and waved Barney over.
Barney wobbled over, eyes hazy, cheeks flushed, and lips a bit on the swollen side. "Well, well, well," he slurred out because he was rather plastered, "Looks like I win in more ways than one." He popped open his billfold and let Ted slide the money in, grinning wildly. "Well, see you loser Ted later... because I am going to get me some." He turned and sauntered out of the bar, the other man following behind him, hand practically glued to Barney's ass.
If Ted had been sober, he might have realized that Barney's iPhone still laying on the table was a bad thing. There was no way for the other man to contact any of them. Unfortunately, he had just as much to drink as Barney. He grinned and slid the thing over to him. "Hey, I can beat his high score at Ninja Ropes Extreme."
---
The man ran his hands along the tenting fabric in Barney’s suit and he helplessly arched forward into it. He could feel the pulse of his erection, feel his boxers grow damp around the head of his cock. Barney tilted his head back to allow the man access to the long column of his throat. He didn’t know it, but his long throat was one of the reasons Ted was unconsciously obsessed with columns. “Mmm… that’s nice…”
All he got from the other man was a chuckle. He didn’t even know the man’s name… just that they had gotten on his bike and driven quite a distance away from McLaren’s. They weren’t even in the man’s house; he had just stopped the bike and said that he couldn’t wait any longer to claim his prize. “Claim away,” Barney had said, carefully draping his jacket (he’d never let the thing drop, since the jacket cost six thousand alone) over the seat of the bike and pressed himself against the wall of the alley, offering all there was of the Barnacle to the man to enjoy and explore.
Suddenly, the man grabbed a handful of Barney’s hair and pulled him to his knees. “Suck my cock, you little slut.”
Barney’s heart leapt into his throat where it seemed to choke him. “’M not a slut,” he protested, the pain in his scalp overwhelming so he let the man pull him where he liked, rather than risk loosing a huge handful of blond hair.
“Oh, you are a slut,” the man chuckled, “I’ve been watching you all evening. See… sluts like you can’t get raped. It’s not possible because you just want it anyway.”
“No, no, no, no…” Barney protested.
“And you’re going to give me everything I want. But don’t worry… I’m not going to harm that pretty face. In fact… I’m going to tell my Bros that your face is the one face to remain unmarked, but of course that takes your willing mouth as well as a few other things.” He smiled coldly. “Strip. That suit is sure to fetch me a pretty penny. Your wallet too and don’t forget that watch. Don’t tell me that it’s a fake Rolex, because I know it’s real.”
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Gambling with Life Part I
Date: 2009-05-13 06:54 pm (UTC)Three shots in, it started to get ridiculous. For one thing neither of them had even tried the 160 proof Whiskey Robin preferred. They generally stuck to 101 proof themselves.
Generally the world’s worst bets are among men… to be more clear… drunk men. And at two o’ four am, Ted came across his worst idea ever.
“I bet you five hundred that you aren’t as hot as you think you are.”
“You’re on… it’s a foolish Ted to get in a bet with a master debater and a cunning linguist.”
---
The result Barney was in the corner of McLaren's, his mouth pressed to that of a hispanic male's, arms wrapped around the man's neck, allowing the other man to cup his slack-covered taunt buttocks with both hands. As Ted watched, Barney's hand suddenly uncurled with two fingers up. Without even breaking liplock, Barney sent a quick bro-lepthic message, "Ted, Ted, right here."
Ted rolled his eyes and returned the bro-lepthy message. "Okay, fine, fine... you win. Men love you too. The five hundred is yours." He gulped back his beer and waved Barney over.
Barney wobbled over, eyes hazy, cheeks flushed, and lips a bit on the swollen side. "Well, well, well," he slurred out because he was rather plastered, "Looks like I win in more ways than one." He popped open his billfold and let Ted slide the money in, grinning wildly. "Well, see you loser Ted later... because I am going to get me some." He turned and sauntered out of the bar, the other man following behind him, hand practically glued to Barney's ass.
If Ted had been sober, he might have realized that Barney's iPhone still laying on the table was a bad thing. There was no way for the other man to contact any of them. Unfortunately, he had just as much to drink as Barney. He grinned and slid the thing over to him. "Hey, I can beat his high score at Ninja Ropes Extreme."
---
The man ran his hands along the tenting fabric in Barney’s suit and he helplessly arched forward into it. He could feel the pulse of his erection, feel his boxers grow damp around the head of his cock. Barney tilted his head back to allow the man access to the long column of his throat. He didn’t know it, but his long throat was one of the reasons Ted was unconsciously obsessed with columns. “Mmm… that’s nice…”
All he got from the other man was a chuckle. He didn’t even know the man’s name… just that they had gotten on his bike and driven quite a distance away from McLaren’s. They weren’t even in the man’s house; he had just stopped the bike and said that he couldn’t wait any longer to claim his prize. “Claim away,” Barney had said, carefully draping his jacket (he’d never let the thing drop, since the jacket cost six thousand alone) over the seat of the bike and pressed himself against the wall of the alley, offering all there was of the Barnacle to the man to enjoy and explore.
Suddenly, the man grabbed a handful of Barney’s hair and pulled him to his knees. “Suck my cock, you little slut.”
Barney’s heart leapt into his throat where it seemed to choke him. “’M not a slut,” he protested, the pain in his scalp overwhelming so he let the man pull him where he liked, rather than risk loosing a huge handful of blond hair.
“Oh, you are a slut,” the man chuckled, “I’ve been watching you all evening. See… sluts like you can’t get raped. It’s not possible because you just want it anyway.”
“No, no, no, no…” Barney protested.
“And you’re going to give me everything I want. But don’t worry… I’m not going to harm that pretty face. In fact… I’m going to tell my Bros that your face is the one face to remain unmarked, but of course that takes your willing mouth as well as a few other things.” He smiled coldly. “Strip. That suit is sure to fetch me a pretty penny. Your wallet too and don’t forget that watch. Don’t tell me that it’s a fake Rolex, because I know it’s real.”
Barney had no other choice, but to obey.