Wednesday: Angst

[prototypical]

We've hit the middle of the week and I'm calliopepurple once again.

After yesterday's cuteness, today we're flipping all that around and going for Angst. Make your characters as sad as you can, and maybe make the readers cry in the process~

The Rules
- No more than five prompts in a row or three for any given fandom. Once they're answered, you can ask for more.
- No spoilers in your prompt until at least 1 week after the original airing or publication date. If there are spoilers in your fic, you must warn in bold and leave at least 3 spaces.
- Please thank the people who fill your prompts. Everyone loves feedback.
- Be nice to the hardworking code monkeys and format your prompts correctly.

Formatting examples:

Babylon 5, Ivanova, missing Marcus
Final Fantasy XII, Basch, life as an only twin
Weiss Kreuz, Aya, he watches his sister from a distance

If you're not in the mood for serious prompts, go venture through the Lonely Prompts and give one a home.

[theme tag=angst]

Comments

[prototypical]

Babylon 5, Ivanova, missing Marcus

[prototypical]

Final Fantasy XII, Basch, life as an only twin

[prototypical]

Weiss Kreuz, Aya, he watches his sister from a distance

[beth-soprano.livejournal.com]

Sanctuary, Kate & or / Will, Kali tag, trying to find Will

[bogged.livejournal.com]

Glee, Kurt/Artie, trying to find a place to eat in the cafeteria at lunch.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, Jo/Lucifer, he fears he's damning her with his love.

[ravenspear.livejournal.com]

Supernatural; Meg/Castiel; he burns the demonic taint from her soul, but the results aren't as positive as he might have imagined.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, Gabriel/girl!Sam, God orders Gabriel to kill his and Sam's baby.

[smaragdbird.livejournal.com]

Gabriel's first reaction was disbelief.
'You can't order me to do this!'

The came anger:
'All that crap about love you said to Lucifer was all just a lie to stop him, wasn't it? You don't love any of us!'

He tried to bargain:
'You could change it. Change her. I could step down from my position. I've been doind fine the last aeons as a pagan god. Then she wouldn't be a nephilim. Just another half-god.'

He fell down on his knees in front of his father and begged him, crying:
'Please...she's just a baby. You have to give her a chance...she's my little girl...Have at least someone else do it because I can't.'

But in the end there's always acceptance.

I'm trying to do what is the best here, Gabriel. You saw the Nephilim and what they did, what happened to them. Do you want to see the same happpening to your child? Do you want Samantha to see it? You of all should have known better.

The house was silent when Gabriel came home. He could see Claire's door standing open and guessed that she was sleeping nestled between Cas and Dean again.
Sam slept on her stomach with arms and legs sprawled over their bed. He leaned down to kiss her neck but didn't wake her up. He whispered:
'I'm sorry.' Into her skin and left the room.
Kate was sound alseep but when he touched her she unconciously grabbed his fingers with her tiny hand. He felt tears spilling down his cheeks and he wanted to say something to her, to apologise, to explain but his throat felt tight and he choked on his own breath. He took Kate out of her crib and held her tight until she died.

'Crowley.'
'Gabriel do you know how-' Crowley began to to complain but stopped as soon as he saw Gabriel's face. His eyes shifted to Kate and the look in his eyes became soft. But for once he didn't comment on the situation.
'I want you to make them forget that Kate ever existed.' Gabriel told him.
'And you?'
'no.'
'You want the whole ten years?' Crowley asked.
'Yes.'
'An angel in hell.' Crowley said dramatically and stepped closer to Gabriel.
'I'm not an angel.' Gabriel told him, whispering.
'For what it's worth, I'm sorry for you mate.' Crowley said sincerely before he kissed Gabriel.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, Dean/Castiel, Castiel regains some of his powers by drinking Dean's blood -- and he's sure Dean hates for it.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

Good Omens, Crowley/Aziraphael, Azira starts loosing his feathers.

[svgurl.livejournal.com]

Smallville, Clark/Oliver, Ollie's worried he's not good enough for Clark

[svgurl.livejournal.com]

Smallville, Clark/Lois, Clark thinks Lois loves Superman more than him

[samueljames]

Torchwood, Jack/Ianto, Jack can't talk about The Valiant so Ianto thinks that Jack doesn't trust him and pushes him away.

[samueljames]

Criminal Minds, Hotch/Reid, an encounter with a violent unsub puts one of them in hospital.

[ice-ziggee.livejournal.com]

Criminal Minds (Slave!AU), Master!Hotch/Convict!Reid, an encounter with a violent unsub puts one of them in hospital.



Should he dare to ask? He wanted so badly to rush to his Master´s side, hold his hand and make sure he was alive and safe but it wasn´t in his place to ask someone to drive him to the hospital. God, what if Hotch had died? His nightmare would restart, the fear and pain and humiliation. He felt the panic rush through his body, his breath became rapit and his limps almost didn´t comply.

In desperate need to find comfort he crawled under Hotch´s desk, curled himself into a tight ball, rocking gently as tears blurred his vision and a quiet sob escaping him.

He had no idea how long he´d been there when a gentle hand on his shoulder startled him. Swiftly turning his head, he saw JJ´s bright blue eyes staring at him with concern he was still so unfamiliar with.

"He´s going to be fine. The bullet went through and through and didn´t cause as much damage as the doctor had first thought," she said in a low voice as not to spook him. Slowly she reached out her hand but he couldn´t control the small flinch as she tenderly cupped his cheek and let her thumb dry away a single tear.

"Come on, Spence," she said as she withdrew her hand, "I´ll drive you to the hospital."

With wide eyes he slowly untangled his limps and crawled from underneath his hideout. He followed her to the car, automatically falling in to the position society commanded from him, three steps behind her left foot. He ignored all effort from JJ to have him walk by her side.

Hotch gave a supple smile as they entered the room but quickly disappeared as Spencer fell to his knees by the bedside, waiting for his Master´s orders.

"Spencer, stand up, please," Hotch said quietly. Instantly he stood by the bed, his head bowed and eyes fixed on his shoes, the brown loafers that his Master had let him choose.

"What´s wrong?" Hotch asked and fingers curled around his limp hand. He still couldn´t look at the older man, his heart still racing with fear.

"Nothing, sir," he rushed out in a single breath. His Master shouldn´t have to worry about him, he shouldn´t even be here by his Master´s bed but he´d been so afraid that it all had been over.

"Please, Spencer, don´t lie to me." Hotch´s voice sounded begging and drew Spencer´s limp hand toward his chest.

Biting the inside of his lips and closing his eyes, he knew he had to obey and tell Hotch what was bothering him. "I..I...got so...afraid. I thought you had died... and... that... I..I..I... had to...go...back." He could feel his eyes water again but tried his hardest to hold the tears at bay.

A brief touch to his cheek made him open his eyes and glance at the dark haired man in the bed before returning his eyes to his loafers. "Please, Sir, forgive my selfishness," he whispered to the floor.

"Look at me, Spencer," Hotch said in a low growl and he didn´t dare disobey. Finally looking, he took in the forming black eye and the split lip but in his Master´s dark eyes all he saw was warmth. "It´s alright to be afraid."

All of a sudden Spencer felt foolish for his fear when his superior was lying in a hospital-bed from a beating and a gunshot wound. He broke the contact and felt as tears escaped down his cheeks as he returned his stare to the floor. "Are..are you..in pain, sir? Is there... anything..I can do?" he asked the floor.

"I´m fine," Hotch replied stubbornly. "Will you stay with me?" he asked more gently and looked at Spencer.

Giving out a breath of relief, Spencer sniffled and finally dared to look at his Master. "I´d like that."

[samueljames]

Without A Trace, Danny/Martin, Danny is upset because Martin won't tell his father about them being together.

Fateful Decisions, WAT, Danny/Martin, Martin won't come out to his dad

[beautybecks.livejournal.com]

Fateful Decisions

"Danny, please don't do this. I don't want us to go to bed angry." Martin pleads.

"I'm not angry. I'm just not tired." Danny insists. "I'm going for a walk." He grabs his keys and walks out.

This is New York, it's freezing outside and Danny regrets the fact he didn't grab his jacket, but he just couldn't stay in that apartment a second longer.

It's too cold for introspection, so goes into the nearest building he finds open. It happens to be a bar.

It would be so easy to order a beer, to get wasted and stop thinking, stop feeling. But he can't do that. He orders a diet coke.

It's just not fair.

Danny can feel tears stinging his eyes and he's too tired to stop them.

"You okay, honey?" A young man, in his mid-twenties, asks him. It takes all of Danny's effort not to flinch at the endearment. It's not a threat.

"I'm fine." Danny sniffs, wiping his eyes with his shirt sleeve.

"Girl troubles?" The man presses, before backing off. "I'm sorry, it's just, you look like you're hurting. I swear, I've got no agenda here, I just don't like seeing people hurt. I'm a doctor, just graduated my medical exams but I'm hoping to go into psychology. My name is Matt."

"I'm Danny."

"Nice to meet you Danny." Matt says, and they shake hands, Danny trying to tell if the guy is sincere or not. Matt just smiles, openly.

"Sorry, it's just... I don't know you."

"I don't think people do, in general." Matt shrugs. "It's hard enough to understand yourself. I don't really understand myself. I think that's why I get a kick out of trying to understand other people." Matt grins and Danny reluctantly breaks into a smile. Then he starts talking.

He tells Matt everything, about how he's in a relationship with a guy at work. How everybody, even the boss knows but they're damn good at their jobs, so this indiscretion, although Danny doesn't see it as an indiscretion, is overlooked. Danny's in love and he wants to tell the world, or at least, not lie about it. It hurts Danny that his boyfriend doesn't feel the same, that he feels like he has to lie to his father. Danny hates feeling like that undermines their relationship, that his boyfriend has chosen his father over his partner, hates that it has to be a choice at all. Danny's not sure he can live like that, he breaks into tears when Matt hugs him,

"You deserve to be happy." Matt whispers, but when Danny opens his eyes, Matt is gone.

Martin is still asleep when Danny finally returns to the apartment. He starts packing, hoping Martin doesn't wake.

"What the hell are you doing?" Martin demands to know.

"What does it look like?" Danny asks, his voice low and tears in his eyes. "I need some space, I need time to think."

"You're leaving me?" Martin can feel the tears welling up in his eyes but he replaces the hurt he feels with anger.

"You're making it impossible for me to be with you." Danny answers.

"But I love you." Martin argues.

"That doesn't mean much when it comes coupled with shame." Danny dismisses. "I don't want you to be ashamed of me. So yeah, I'm leaving. And I hope you find happiness with some girl you can take home to daddy." Danny closes the door behind him and doesn't look back.

[samueljames]

Flash Forward, Mark and Demetri, Mark wants something more than friendship but Demetri feels like he owes it to Zoe to go ahead with the wedding.

[samueljames]

Numb3rs, Don/Colby, The day of Don's funeral is sunny and feels wrong.

[kijikun.livejournal.com]

torchwood, Gwen/John Hart, sometimes he wonders if he's a stand in for Jack.

No Fic

[alba17.livejournal.com]

I don't think I could write this, but what an interesting pairing! I don't think I've ever seen it. Good idea.

[modestroad.livejournal.com]

DCU, Jadon Todd, no one remembers him

There was a boy named Jason Todd.

[phoenixofborg.livejournal.com]

There was a boy named Jason Todd, and he is a series of files in the public record. There’s a birth certificate, and a patchy school grade school record filled with teacher’s complaints and unexplained absences, suspensions and detentions and disciplinary action. There’s hospital records from a broken arm when he was eight. Then, at age eleven, there’s a flurry of paperwork as his legal custody is transferred to a one Bruce Wayne, and suddenly there are medical records and vaccinations and a much more thorough academic record for two years from one of Gotham’s better private schools. There are still suspensions, detentions, and unexplained absences, though with a caveat that the teachers are sure he would succeed if he just applied himself.

There was a boy named Jason Todd, and he is a collection of memories – faint ones, fading ones. People knew Jason Todd, but they’ve mostly forgotten him. Teachers, if reminded, will remember one of the most belligerent students they ever had, and shake their heads sadly, knowing such boys rarely do well in the world. There were friends, and sometimes they can’t think why they stopped spending time with him, and there was a pretty girl named Rena, who remembers him as her first crush and sometimes wonders what became of him.

There was a boy named Jason Todd, and he is a box in the attic of Wayne Manor, filed with things that Alfred never threw away. There are CD’s filled with loud music and magazines filled with fast cars and a surprising number of books, mostly horror and mysteries. No one can bear to open it or throw it out, so it stays in a corner gathering dust.

There was a boy named Jason Todd, and he is a headstone in a Gotham cemetery. He is a paragraph-long obituary in a Gotham paper about a local boy who was tragically beaten to death in a ‘gang-related incident’. It’s not the truth, but he would hardly be the first or last boy to die young in Gotham, and the only reason it receives any attention at all is because he was living with Bruce Wayne.

Six months later, something claws its way out of Jason’s grave, but it is not Jason. The detentions and the friends and the loud music are left behind in the dirt, and this new life has very little to do with the Jason Todd who liked fast cars and mystery novels and everything to do with the mask he wore for such a very short time. It’s a Robin that comes back from the dead, bitter and purposeless. Not Jason.

There are never flowers on Jason’s grave. The ‘Bat-family’ knows that Robin is not there, and no one else cares that Jason Todd may not have come back.

[modestroad.livejournal.com]

DCU, Barbara Gordon, Jim Gordon, Bruce Wayne, post surgery depression

[modestroad.livejournal.com]

DCU, Roy/Donna, "You think you're the only one that lost a child?"

[modestroad.livejournal.com]

Marvel, Hope, X-Men, teenage wasteland

[drabblewriter.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, Sam/Nick, nightmares

[smaragdbird.livejournal.com]

Dear Sam

I don't know if this will surprise you or not but when you're reading this I will be gone.
You and your brother have been very kind to me and to leave hurts me more than I can say. Thanks to you I found hope.
I know you denied it many times but when you wake up from another nightamre the next time the devil's face won't stare back at you in your own bed.
You told me from the beginning that you would never confuse me with Lucifer but dreams are tricky things, aren't they? All those nights...it hurt me when you looked at me, eyes wide with panic and instead of seeking comfort you couldn't stay far enough away from me. I know how you feel. Sometimes I look into a mirror and all I see is him.
Don't follow me, Sam. I'm trying to do what's best for both of us. I know that it hurt you too when you realised what you were unconciously doing, so don't try to find me. I'm sparing us both the pain.

Yours

Nick

[drabblewriter.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, Sam/Dean and Castiel, the angel does not approve of the brothers’ relationship

Filled: SPN, Sam/Dean and Castiel, the angel does not approve of the brother's relationship

[hugglewolf.livejournal.com]

Cas didn’t get far. By the time Dean pulled on some pants, ignoring Sam’s protests, and staggered out of the door, the angel was leaning against the Impala, staring blankly at the motel.

“Cas? Cas, you never learned to knock?” He meant it lightly, but it came out defensive. Guilty.

When had he started feeling guilty about what he and Sam had?

“This...” Cas jerked his head in the direction of the room, of Sam. “This is a sin, Dean. I pulled you from Hell, remade you, died for you...all so you could sully yourself in this way. Perhaps I was right about Sam being an abomination after all.”

Despite himself, Dean slammed his fist into Castiel’s face. He got the result he expected, but it didn’t stop him trying it again, desperate to even draw just a trickle of blood or a grunt of pain. Anything.

Castiel caught his fist easily and held it there until Dean stopped fighting him.

“Fuck you,” he panted. “Sam didn’t start this, I did. So if anyone’s the abomination, I guess it’s me. Your righteous man.”

Castiel turned away, and Dean felt like he wanted to be sick. Castiel’s shoulders had slumped, like they had when he’d learned that hey, your Dad doesn’t actually want to know that you’re on the ropes, on the run and you really need his protection and help right now. Because that was it, wasn’t it?

He had Sam, they both had Bobby. Cas only had him, now.

He felt the pressure as Castiel spread his wings, and risked injury by grabbing at the angel’s wrist. “Cas, please. You can’t let this come between us. We need you. You need us. Come on.”

Cas shrugged him off. “Apparently, you need Sam more.”

He was gone, the telltale beat of wings fading too fast. Dean stayed out there the rest of the night, hoping the angel just needed time. By the time Sam finally convinced him to come in, the sun was up, and whatever happened next, Dean knew they were all going it alone.

[drabblewriter.livejournal.com]

Supernatural, one-sided Dean/Castiel, Castiel is horrified when he finds out how Dean feels about him

fill - Wrong in so many ways

[amancham.livejournal.com]

This is wrong in so many ways, Castiel stopped to try to count them a long time ago. He was still trying to figure out how to react. Mainly he was trying to figure a way around it. Around confrontation. What was he supposed to do with this? How was he supposed to react? He had wondered a while ago, why Dean looked at him with that strange expression on his face. He had been wondering, what was going on in Deans mind when he caught the young man watching him ... Eagerly, really.

The day that he had looked into Dean's mind Castiel regrets deeply. He could not get those pictures out of his head anymore and they mortified and horrified him ever since. The way Dean felt about him was plain wrong. It could not be, it was not supposed to be like that. Sure, there was a special bond between them. After all Castiel was the one, who raised Dean from perdition. He had grabbed the young man and pulled him out of hell. That was not something you would do for just anyone or would easily forget. But the way Dean felt about him ... That had nothing to do with his saving the man from hell. It had to do with hormones, testosterone and it was plain wrong.

Ever since he had glimpsed into Deans mind, Castiel just wanted to leave. He tried hard, not to lead Dean on. He kept his distance and ignored his calls often enough, just to show him, that he doesn't feel that way. But no matter how badly he treated Dean, every time he looked into the other man’s mind, he still could see those thoughts, could feel those feelings. Warmth and love towards him, a longing for his body that Castiel neither could nor wanted to understand.

What would his father say about this? His brothers and sisters? How often had they argued about the humans and their lust for flesh? Now that he was the victim, the aim of one of them, his lust, his longing, he wasn't all too sure that it was normal. No actually, he was very sure that it was far from normal. Man and woman. That was the natural order. Love and sex to produce children, to keep the human race alive. But Dean? This was wrong. He did not care about natural order, about keeping the human race alive. He wanted Castiel. Badly. And the angel was at a loss. How was he supposed to deal with it, with Dean?

Actually, he had tried to deal with it, but he was just one of the soldiers, a lower Angel. He could not alter Dean's feelings and wishes, even though he tried.

“Hey, Cas ...”

Castiel turned and looked at Dean with a horrified expression. Certainly, he had spent too much time thinking about this. He needed some time apart, some time to think about it, to process.

“I need to go.” He simply said and vanished into thin air. Under these circumstances, he just couldn't deal with Dean any longer. It was impossible.

***
so not my thoughts and feelings about gay love but hey ... that's what your prompts were, that's what I tried to write. *lol* hope you like.