surgery

[.livejournal.com]

July 30th I have surgery.

I've been waiting for this since March when the doctors told me that I'd have to have it if I wanted any hopes of getting pregnant and having kids.

So, I tell my mom and sister and their response was as if I told them something so mundane. There was no real excitement concern about it.

I mean, my mom asked how I was doing, but my sister was like "thanks for letting me know...let me know if you need anything as well."

They, but especially my sister, can GFSF!

Like...seriously?!

I know we aren't a demonstrative family, but JFC! Nothing from my sister asking if I need a ride to/from the hospital. And I don't think I should have to ask her to be there for me. I already know, from when I first told her my diagnosis that her work is more important than at least offering to take me to an appt or asking how I'm doing. She was like "don't worry, I've had some removed before"

I don't care that you've had some removed before, this is my first MAJOR surgery ever. I mean, I've been put under for oral surgery, but this is different. IT'S AT A FUCKING HOSPITAL!

Just thinking about this and their reaction really hits home how incredibly fractured my family is...or always has been.

last night I was listening to some music and Cowboy Take Me Away by the Chicks came on and I fucking started to cry! Specifically at this part:

I wanna walk and not run
I wanna skip and not fall
I wanna look at the horizon and not see a building standing tall
I wanna be the only one for miles and miles
Except for maybe you and your simple smile
Oh, it sounds good to me
Yes, it sounds so good to me

And it also didn't help that right before I'd seen pictures of some friends with their family and I'd always known how close they were...to the point of actually hating that one of the family units spent more time with the wife's family and hardly any time with the husband's family. And I know they're close...at least close enough to go to church together, but there could be stuff going on in private that I don't know about. It's just that social media-wise, it's all about the wife's family.

Anyway, I'm not close to my family. I don't even feel all that close with my chosen family because they all have their own family they're close with and Jesus, I need a nap! I'm making myself all weepy again.

Friday: Amusement

[4bdnsn0wflake.livejournal.com]

It’s Friday, and I am 4bdnsn0wflake, and I hope everybody had a great time this week.
 
A heartfelt thank you to everyone who left prompts and those who filled them!
 
Our final theme for this week is Amusement.
 
Prompts should include some sort of hobby or other way people amuse themselves.

Just a few rules:
No more than five prompts in a row.
No more than three prompts in the same fandom.
Use the character's full names and fandom's full name for ease adding to the Lonely Prompts spreadsheet.
No spoilers in prompts for a month after airing, or use the spoiler cut option found here.
If your fill contains spoilers, warn and leave plenty of space, or use the above mentioned spoiler cut.

Prompts should be formatted as follows: [Use the character's full names and fandom's full name]
Fandom, Character +/ Character, Prompt

Some examples to get the ball rolling...

+ Saiyuki, any character(s), making Cat’s Cradles to pass the time
 
+ Ouran High School Host Club, Souh Tamaki/Ootori Kyouya, Tamaki persuades Kyouya to join him in investigating a commoner’s amusement park
 
+ Gundam Wing, Duo Maxwell, teasing your mates is a kind of hobby
 
+ Author’s choice, any character(s), trying a hobby s/he (or they) has never tried before

We are now using AO3 to bookmark filled prompts. If you fill a prompt and post it to AO3 please add it to the Bite Sized Bits of Fic from 2021 collection. See further notes on this new option here.

Not feeling any of today’s prompts? Check out the just created Lonely Prompts Spreadsheet. For more recent prompts to write, you can also use LJ’s advanced search options to limit keyword results to only comments in this community.

While the Lonely Prompts Spreadsheet and LJ's advanced search options are available, bookmarking the links of prompts you like might work better for searching for in the future.


tag=amusement